Kung Fu- Camaraderie

While working at PCS I did my best to go out on lunch dates with cousins and friends from school. But if I wasn't at PCS, I was wandering alone in the canyons or re-watching Netflix till I couldn't stand it anymore. I would fill the remainder of my time with more PCS until I didn't recognize myself-I'd turn into Chloe the Tyrant :) No joke...I'd run to California every few weeks, but each trip made me feel more lonesome than ever.

I gave myself exactly 1 year at PCS, and the day came.

In all honesty I could have been a PCS Lifer-worked there forever. Although there were some pretty awful days, the work was simple and the camaraderie between staff was one of a kind. I was banking massive amounts of overtime and was comfortable marching around the cottage ordering people about ;) I could work as little or as much as I wanted, and go about as I pleased. I was completely over all my anxiety, and in the language of PCS "idgaf" was my new mantra.

As the year mark approached I got antsy. Nothing tasted good, nothing on Netflix drew my attention, even the local shops put me off... The year didn't turn out as I expected so I packed up and jetted off East.

A month later I was driving around in the heavy air of the South, frustrated I couldn't find Kung Fu. A teenager was trailing after my car in the parking lot I was looping around in, which confused me to no other because it was so hot outside. (Neal, who is a fellow student's, mom saw me driving around lost, and sent Neal to stop me from driving away.)

The air was only a few degrees cooler inside the building which is more like a 3 car garage. So it was really sweltering. I just picked up like I never left...except my year of absolutely doing nothing movement wise set me back. The movement was in my muscle memory but it was limiting and inefficient, just holding my arms up was a workout. We finished the last half hour outside as the heat was burning off and the sun was setting.

I was going through the form motions, but mind wandering when my life felt like it was in the upswing, when my movement was back on track. Kung Fu wise I struggled-but when I did Kung Fu like modern in the studuio I moved really well. I have the video showing rather efficient movement. But I decided I needed to leave ASAP last April.

I attempted to further movement training while I was out West. I dragged my self to modern the first week I was there. And it was too hard, too abstract and I remember this awful leaping combination. 

I really should just develop my own technique of modern-Kung Fu hybrid. Oooooo that would be so cool. I think about enrolling in a Laban Movement Analysis (LMA) Course all the time so I can do just that. I actually wish I could just do LMA, Kung Fu, Modern, Pilates and BioCored Full Time. 

I will soon. 

I discovered in the past year something I love. Genuine Camaraderie- or at least I've coined the term. PCS had it and that's what it's like at Kung Fu- And the reason I continue going back.

Would it be more beneficial to take dance classes since that's ultimately what I really want to move well in? But I would have to drive all the way to the city by myself and there's no camaraderie in that.

Proof I was there.

Kung Fu this week was really good. They are back trying to talk me into competing.

"Woah, slow down it's my third day back." I was thinking haha.

I do have some idea of what forms I would like explore only because my mom reminded me... She remembered Aurora performing a fan form that was beautiful and balletic. You are supposed to learn a weapons form, which I'm not sure if a fan counts, despite Mulan's besting of Shan Yu at the end.

Let's be honest. The movement here is totally contemporary ballet kung fu fusion.

Now lets get our Mirror Neurons and move like this.

5 Months

December:

 I decided to skip Christmas this year and work at PCS. It was kind of like Christmas Study abroad. I started off with 4 consecutive days of 15 hour shifts...one of them I was left alone on the cottage (what other staff is willing to work Christmas Eve?)(Also, can we say major liability.) (Had like 6 emergency calls.)

 K said it was her worst Christmas Ever. We still managed to smile through it all.

I finished the 4 days and still found it in me to work some regular shifts, and three more doubles that week. Morale hit an all time low between staff. My last day of the ordeal, a patient tried to choke me twice--don't worry guys I used my Kung Fu. We were then trying to restrain her and she gave me a double black eye, kicking me in the face. I flew to Cali, took seven days off and told PCS not to call.

In Cali after the ordeal... I slept so much that week.

January:

I decided to test my limits on how many consecultive days I could work before taking a day off. I said yes to every shift they asked for...early mornings, late nights, and double shifts. I made it 3 weeks. I felt silly because there are people who work harder and last longer... but I knew I had to rest. I was finishing up my 3rd double in a row, at the end of three weeks, when a staff thought it would be funny to throw a snow ball at me. I went ballistic. That night I stood at the back of the hallway absolutely reeling and in agony from dealing with PCS BS... There wasn't enough female staff for anyone to trade me out. Looking back January Sucked.

This is what its like everyday at PCS.

 February:

 I used to work with the middle school girls all the time. Some of them are BIG girls...occasionally my anxiety will flare up and I'll be in a panic... What if I get beat today? What if there's a riot? What if a few gang up on staff and hurt us enough and we are sent to the hospital? KD and I were having the same feelings, but survived the day so we took a silly photo.

We're alive and didn't get assaulted today :)

On Valentines Day I woke up feeling awful. I was not sure what medically was going on, but was legit half asleep, till I was sent outside to facilitate gym time. The cold must have stimmed my brain. I worked up to the last minute and hopped a jet to Long Beach that night, followed by Disneyland.

PCS Break

                                                March: 

I started grad school interviews the first week and had a horrible experience in Omaha, which sent me jogging to the school/interview. BioCored Training, and a week in ATL. It was like a step back into my old life. PCS was fine. Though coming back is extremely difficult and 5 days can feel like 5 weeks... No Easter for me this year---We joked about the "Year Without Holidays." But let me shout out to all my amazing Atheist friends who worked Easter. You can always count on them stepping up to work during major Christian holidays.

April: 

PCS is not a place for the faint of heart, the weak, or the lazy. A staff who works extremely hard 70+ hours a week was running late one Sunday morning. I was panicking because in no way could I run the volatile middle school girls alone. She finally arrived, sat on the floor and started to cry. She was close to 80 hours and was facing a 14 hour day. I felt morally obligated to step up and  to take her place for the second shift. Having her work with such emotional distress was not right. Thank goodness for amazing friends like K who said, "If you're staying, I'm staying." Cue Troy Bolton.

 Also there was some Disney Time in April. I made a video of all my favorite California things, but new clothes and Disneyland were the highlights.

Princess Shot

Non-Exercise Activity Thermogenesis and Grad School

I would really like to take a reformer class right now. Everyday. Not for exercise but for Non-Exercise Activity Thermogenesis (NEAT). I'd really like to go train in Sanda, take that african dance class in the city, and walk my dog too.

The lack of NEAT in my life is slowly killing my soul.

I stole away for a few days to the happiest place on earth (which was a small NEAT relief and I have a season pass), returning just in time for my treatment center job.

I pride myself in having eternal patience, but on Friday used every ounce of my will power to not scream and stomp my feet. I was absolutely reeling because everyone suddenly was compliant when the supervisor walked in and started yelling, yet they called me a bitch when I was polite and reasonable.

I almost put in my resignation, but I didn't. The little NEAT I had a few days before let un-jaded Chloe reemerge. I was thrust back into the stress of working my job and had a hard time coping.

One of the proverbial lies patients love to tell is the reason they have to carry around loads of objects because it's their "coping skill," even though it's against the rules.  I started to think about what my coping skill would be...My phone. I usually wait until the patients are in bed before retrieving my phone, which sometimes can be 11 or 12 hours disconnected from the world. I decided to carry it around in my pocket. I felt so much better.

I do get 3 hours of NEAT a week teaching dance outside of school and the treatment center. The students are polar opposites of what I deal with normally. I find them agreeable, kind and lovely to work with.

Yesterday was very difficult to prep for teaching though. The lack of NEAT in my life has created a version of myself that I loathe. I have lost all movement efficiency, and motivation. To combat this I feel like running to the nearest Pilates studio begging them to hire me, so I can have free access to their equipment.

On top of all this lack of NEAT, I am in school and want to drop out every day because they make  us sit and learn things like Glomerular Filtration. Emphasis on the sitting part.

 I am applying to Grad school but don't particularly want to spend the next three years getting an advance degree because of the precious time that will be lost. My only hope is that the time will be recovered because I'll have a good salary with normal hours, and then I'll will finally be able to pursue things I really want to do. (like taking pilates, trying african dance, and walking my dog)

On a side note, I feel like applying to Grad school is a scam. I am not one of those students campaigning for free tuition or an easy path, but it's absolutely ridiculous.

I was happy to pay the 150$ application free, but then mildly upset when I was asked to pay additional 60$ for a supplemental application. It took me over 15+ hours of work to come up with that money. I looked up the salary of admission officers and it's around 38K a year. I would hope they put 210 dollars of their work hours into my application because that seems to be the most reasonable and fair thing to do.

Each school has their own prerequisites. What is frustrating that some schools require dim subjects like Basic Sociology. My job is 100% current social problems and I really don't want to spend a thousand dollars for 3 credits that says I read a two hundred dollar textbook. Persistent Bad Attitude...I am sorry.

Then some schools seem a perfect match but then require a random elective courses in subjects like public speaking, or painting, or Anthropology. Seriously? Let me come show you how articulate I can be, whilst I paint still life, and talk about ancient Mesopotamia.

Every school requires a different random course and judging which ones are worth the extra thousands of dollars in "required courses (costs)" is exhausting and disheartening.

But at least we have days at the Happiest Place on Earth to make it all a little better.

Month in Review

Yesterday we hooked someone up to electrodes and took an Electrocardiogram (ECG). I have a test tomorrow so I am going to type what is happening.

Basically-YOU can ignore this part.

P wave is the depolarization of the Atria, or Atrial Systole (contraction)

QRS complex firing of AV nodes to depolarize the ventricles or Ventricular Systole (contraction)

R Ventricular Contraction Peak

S repolarization of the Atria - With S-T segment plateau in Myocardium Action Potential which I believe has to do with a latent period in the Pacemaker Potential which we need so our heart doesn't stay in tetany (contraction)

There is other stuff but that's the gist of it.

START HERE

Then we had to take blood pressure readings. I know for nurses it is day one in nursing school but for someone who has never done it before it was a little stressful. Especially since they didn't show us how to perform it. I'm also not a nursing student and we had to read step by step instructions. I really have a hard time comprehending and concentrating lately.

And then, there are the nerves in the brain which make me question all my beliefs about life.

#BioCored #SomehowImissedsomething #magicandactionpotentials

I really hate physiology. I went to the lab to find help. We had been studying the effects of toxins on the heart rate and strength of contractions. I was filling out a report and was stuck identifying what the drugs were specifically inhibiting. 

"Uhm, the heart..."

The TA told me to think smaller...

"The cells?"

The TA told me to think like a doctor.  "Think in the sarcolemma, what would this unknown toxin be inhibiting?"

The ryanodine channels? They aren't opening, so calcium is not being released. So... there is no action potential?" 

In case you haven't figured it out yet. Life is Action Potentials.

Oh and my job. Let me just reiterate...

Month in Review

I'm taking a course in which I have no foundational knowledge.  I'm kind of ticked me off because I've been alive for almost a quarter century, and this is all new to me.

I wish someone would have at least mentioned something about the Soduim-Potassium Pumps. I'm tempted to not believe in them because...how do they know this is really going on?

Also if it is true, do I need to start eating bananas because I had no idea potassium is so important?

The pumps are keeping you alive.



This is what we learned on the first day. It's the critic acid cycle or Krebs cycle. They mentioned it once in Biology 5 years ago but I thought it was dumb so I didn't pay attention. Actually whenever someone mentions the Krebs cycle, I always think about Mr. Krabs.















We also go to the laboratory. There are only 3 people in my section. An old lady, me, and then a guy who's applying to dental school. Dental School guy is getting us through lab. Last week we had to do a stupid chemistry experiment. I didn't learn anything. But felt like this.






I'm repeating a course. I took it in 2010. To apply to the program I'm applying, it has to be in the last five years of your start date. It's horrible. We wear lab coats though.

It's a whole class of evil scientists. JK. Most people are really snobby and think they are gonna be the next surgeon general. But all I'm thinking is "you look kind of frumpy in your lab coat."

We study cadavers a good 6 to 8 hours a week.
We look like this, except we wear lab coats. Quote of the day, "This leg is really heavy." It was just a leg.

My group was struggling to locate the plantaris during open lab. Having taken the course before I knew exactly were it was. They didn't believe me when I showed it to them. But the TA validated it, and they said "Oh, you were right." It's a pretty easy muscle to find cause it looks like a plant.







I have become completely and utterly desensitized at my job. I'm not really surprised by anything anymore.







I joined this research group thinking I was going to be one of the cool kids, make lots of friends. It's basically slave labor. We are currently working on a project which includes my least favorite activity. Searching for articles and citing them. We were each given 100 articles to cite over midterms.

Took a secret picture lol

Last week, they were going on and on about some higher thought process topic...I was just a warm body in the room. They asked my opinion. I told them the truth. The professor is my cousin so I feel duty bound to press on. 

That was September.

Debunking the Ballet Hamstring Myth

I've become much more adept to studying than I was say... 5 years ago. I never studied until the day of the exam, but now I study everyday. I don't do anything except study and go to PCS (the children's treatment center.)

I spent the last several hours reviewing dimensional analysis, and molarity...taking 10 min breaks every 45 mins following perfect studying habits. I decided I deserved an hour break for lunch and came back to where I left off...well, I forgot everything in an hour. Apparently I don't understand it.

Since I'm facing 5 hours in the lab tonight, I'm taking a few hours off to enlighten everyone, especially the misinformed dance teachers and students everywhere. Hold on to your tights!!!!

I took a modern class this summer. Hated it. The icing on the cake was spending 20 minutes discussing how to execute développé and extensions without engaging your quads or hip flexors. "If you engage you hamstring on your working leg, you will increase your extensions because your quads won't get tired (since your working with your hamstring). And have a longer hold time in développé front and a la seconde"??????? um...that's not how it works mechanically.

I have no idea how this teacher believed she was actually extending without the use of her quads or hip flexors. And I've heard this "idea" many times throughout my life and it is impossible. Yes use you hamstrings to lift initially, but they aren't going hold your leg out there. (Like this teacher was trying to get everyone to do.)

EVERYBODY LISTEN. Because I know lots of stuff and no one ever takes advantage of my knowledge. And this piece of information blew the minds of some kids at a random dance studio I teach it  (yes I know I said I'd never teach again, but somehow it happened.)

Pelvic Floor. Martha Graham told dancers "to lift with their underparts." That's exactly it.

Thank You Margie Mack. I don't like to use Google Image Search.

I had everyone lay down, find the ASIS (Anterior Superior Illiac Spine (front hip bones)) and then move medial and posterior into their organs and then literally lift their underparts. Working to engage and feel those deep muscle groups. What do you know?

Kids stood up did their développés and were freaking out. "Do you have any idea how much easier it is?"  "OMGOSH! It's so easy now." "You taught us something new that actually works!"

I used to charge people 45$ dollars an hour to share my knowledge...not just this... I once fixed someone's pirouettes in like 3 minutes before an audition once. But only like 3 people cared so that's why I work at PCS (the children's treatment center now.) But really I can like...fix anything.

 Perfect Split? Give me an hour....well, if you are close haha. If not then a few weeks.

Tear your achilles tendon? I'll get that calf to start firing...

Ok sorry everyone. This was not supposed to be how amazing BioCored and myself happen to be...I just get really excited with how BioCord principles work right away and I cleared up a lot of misinformation. Basically changed those dancers lives :)

KORRA OUT.